Remember the red pen of your high school teacher?
Whenever you repeated a word in a sentence, there it was: the angry red mark. Ouch.
Over time, like most writers, you probably learned to avoid word repetition, and you diligently replaced duplicated words with synonyms or pronouns.
But did you know word repetition can add rhythm to your writing?
That it can strengthen your message, and make it more memorable?
And that repetition can shape your voice?
No matter what you write, whether it’s a blog post, sales copy, or poetry, purposeful repetition can add power and pizzazz to your writing.
Shall we start with an example from poetry?
Repetition examples in poetry
I’ve not read poetry for years, but recently I’ve fallen in love with Mary Oliver’s evocative poems.
Below follows a fragment from her poem Mushrooms. Read it aloud, and notice how repetition of the words through and their adds rhythm:
red and yellow skulls
pummeling upward
through leaves,
through grasses,
through sand; astonishing in their suddenness,
their quietude,
their wetness, they appear
on fall morning, some
balancing in the earth
on one hoof
packed with poison,
others billowing chunkily, and delicious
And in the poem The Moths, she repeats a longer phrase:
I was so full of energy.
I was always running around, looking
at this and that.If I stopped the pain was unbearable.
If I stopped and thought, maybe
the world
can’t be saved,
the pain was unbearable.Finally, I had noticed enough.
All around me in the forest the white moths floated.How long do they live, fluttering in and out of the shadows?
But this is not an article about poetry. Repetition works in any type of writing, even in sales copy.
Repetition examples in sales copy
Perhaps Apple’s copywriters are the poets in the world of marketing. Here are some examples of repetition in Apple’s sales copy:
Your all purpose, all day notebook.
And:
iOS 13
A whole new look.
On a whole new level.
And:
Every decision that goes into iPhone makes it stand apart. From the way it’s made, to the way we build in privacy and security from the start, to the innovative ways we recycle its components.
Repetition not only provides a beat to your writing, it can also reinforce a key point. In the examples above, repetition strengthens the message that iOS 13 is wholly new and that the iPhone stands out in many different ways.
Repetition also shapes your voice
I first learned about repetition as a technique for forming your voice from author Andy Martin.
In his book Reacher Said Nothing: Lee Child and the Making of Make Me, he tells the story of Child writing his 20th Jack Reacher book, and he explains his discovery of the double tap in Child’s writing.
The double tap is a repetition of the word no. This is an example from Make Me:
The street was quiet. Just seven similar houses, three on a side, plus one at the dead end. No moving vehicles, no pedestrians. No eyes, no interest. Not really a Neighborhood Watch kind of place.
And from Persuader:
I saw nobody. No cops, no ambulances, no police tapes, no medical examiners. No unexplained men in Lincoln Town Cars.
Perhaps no one seems to use repetition as much as Nora Ephron. This is from Heartburn:
Heartburn. That, it seemed to me as I lay in bed, was what I was suffering from. That summed up the whole mess: heartburn. Compound heartburn. Double-digit heartburn. Terminal heartburn.
And:
I loved to cook, so I cooked. And then the cooking became a way of saying I love you. And then the cooking became the easy way of saying I love you. And then the cooking became the only way of saying I love you.
And:
Vera said: ‘Why do you feel you have to turn everything into a story?’ So I told her why: Because if I tell the story, I control the version. Because if I tell the story, I can make you laugh, and I would rather have you laugh at me than feel sorry for me. Because if I tell the story, it doesn’t hurt as much. Because if I tell the story, I can get on with it.
At school you may have been told that repetitiveness is bad. But if an award-winning screenwriter and author can repeat words and sentence fragments, who are we to say that repetition is bad?
The above are just three examples of repetition in Ephron’s writing. There are many, many, many more.
Repetition keeps readers on track
Word repetition can provide a cadence to your writing and guide readers so they don’t get lost. This is especially important in long sentences.
In the example below, Tommy Orange repeats the phrase where to help readers understand the sentence structure:
The grass is chalked with straight lines that separate foul and fair, that reach out to the stands and back toward the infield, where the players play the game, where they pitch and swing and steal and tag, where they signal and hit and strike and ball, score runs, where they sweat and wait in the shade of the dugout, just chewing and spitting until all the innings run out.
And, in the same way, he repeats the word whose here:
That guy in the black windbreaker, whose hair is fully grayed and receding, and whose stomach comes out a little more each year, whose feet and knees hurt when he stands or walks too long, he’s okay, he’s making it.
Word repetition is only bad when it happens by accident. Most of the time, it’s like the drum beat accompanying your writing.
And sometimes, the drum has a solo—when word repetition becomes the essence of a sentence. Here’s Tommy Orange again:
She told me the world was made of stories, nothing else, just stories, and stories about stories.
And:
The trouble with believing is you have to believe that believing will work, you have to believe in belief.
A drum solo is rare. Mostly repetition is an underlying beat, providing a cadence to your writing.
How to use repetition correctly
As Joe Moran writes in his book First You Write a Sentence:
Repetition is fine if you and the reader know you are doing it.
But how does your reader know you’re doing repeating a word on purpose?
Below follows an example of repetition that’s so obvious, that it has to be on purpose. Here’s Tommy Orange again:
She put a cough drop into her mouth so casually that you could tell she probably ate a lot of cough drops and smoked a lot of cigarettes, and never quite beat the cough, but beat it enough while she was sucking on a cough drop, and so ate them constantly.
Moran suggests that inexperienced writers use repetition too randomly, making it jarring. And more experienced writers are afraid of repetition, so they vary their words too much, making the writing feel unnatural.
Let’s have another look at the sentence with cough drops. Imagine Tommy Orange had been afraid of repetition. He would have written:
She put a cough drop into her mouth so casually that you could tell she probably ate a lot of them and smoked a lot of cigarettes, and never quite beat the tickle in her throat, but she could cope while she was sucking on throat lozenges, and so ate them constantly.
Note how the music has gone out of that sentence? Without the music, the sentence drags on a little, making it feel too long and cumbersome.
One more fabulous example of word repetition
In The Writing Life, Annie Dillard writes about not saving ideas for writing for later:
One of the few things I know about writing is this: spend it all, shoot it, play it, lose it, all, right away, every time. Do not hoard what seems good for a later place in the book, or for another book; give it, give it all, give it now. The impulse to save something good for a better place later is the signal to spend it now.
Why do I like these so much?
The first sentence has a great selection of strong verbs: shoot, play, lose. Read this sentence aloud and you’ll notice a great rhythm, too.
The second sentence ends with a triple tap for stress: give it, give it all, give it now. Again, read aloud to appreciate the rhythm.
The third sentence is the clincher summarizing the key advice, so readers remember: Grab any good ideas right now and spend them.
How to put music into your writing
Using repetition correctly is not as difficult as your high school teacher would have told you.
The easiest trick is Child’s double tap of repeated no’s. No repetition. No music. And no fun in your writing.
The second easiest trick is a variation of the double tap: to repeat the first word of a sentence at the start of the next sentence (this is called anaphora).
Stop being afraid of repetition. Stop paying attention to readability scores telling you to mix it up. Stop worrying about your high school teacher crossing out your words, with her ghastly red pencil. Instead, have fun with word repetition and listen to the rhythm of your writing.
Next, pay attention to word repetition in good writing. Apple’s website is a good starting point—you’ll find repetition is never overbearing there, and mostly used to reinforce key points, making them more memorable.
In Ephron’s Heartburn and Orange’s There There, repetition is a more dominant style figure. Read their work aloud and note how it pulsates, echoes, and sometimes booms. Reading aloud can help you develop an ear for when repetition works.
Writing without word repetition is like music without a beat.
Like a rock band without a drummer.
Happy writing!
Books mentioned in this post:
- New and Selected Poems, Volume One
by Mary Oliver
- Reacher Said Nothing: Lee Child and the Making of Make Me
by Andy Martin
- Heartburn
by Nora Ephron
- There There
by Tommy Orange
- First You Write a Sentence
by Joe Moran
- The Writing Life by Annie Dillard
by Mary Oliver
by Andy Martin
by Nora Ephron
by Tommy Orange
by Joe MoranRecommended reading on rhythm and writing:
Rhythm in writing: How to make your words swing and swirl
Parallelism: How to say more with fewer words
The rule of three: How to add rhythm to your words
I really enjoyed your commentary! The only thing I’m good at is playing piano. Throughout my life, music has played a significant role in my life.
It is now clear to me why repetition is an invaluable part of my writing process. The analogy of music is so appropriate here! The Apple and Nora Ephron examples you provided are fantastic (seriously, what is she incapable of writing?) Thanks for pointing that out!
As a pianist you’ll be good at putting music into your words, too!
Greetings Henneke
Your composing is what I truly wanted to hear Henneke. I’m continuously attempting to supplant rehashing words with their equivalents. In any event, when I would rather not eliminate them, I’m continually informed that ‘something other than what’s expected could work here’.
It’s difficult to clarify ‘significant composition’ for people that just value Jargon.
A lot of people say that repetition is always wrong but that’s true. It can be used for rhythm and style, as long as we do it on purpose. Using synonyms instead can sometimes feel unnatural.
Thank you for stopping by, Jackolier.
Henneke, This is a wonderful topic. I just wish you would provide more business examples here (and elsewhere) so emerging copywriters could more easily see how to apply this kind of principle to marketing writing without making it too literary. Thank you.
I don’t think I can meet your expectations, Marcia. Gathering examples is hugely time consuming, and sometimes I find examples from fiction writing are simply better. Even so, in this post you have three examples of word repetition in sales copy from Apple, and three examples from blog writing if you check out my own writing in the last paragraphs.
If you’re looking for more examples of word repetition, I recommend you read Apple’s website or continue reading my blog. I use repetition often.
Also, creating your own swipe file of examples is one of the best ways to learn copywriting.
Thanks for your reply, Henneke. Of course fiction will provide better examples of good writing techniques. However, that doesn’t mean you can write a sales page as if it’s A Farewell to Arms!
If your audience is mainly business owners and copywriters (maybe I’m wrong about that), I believe they would appreciate more business-related examples, even if you need to make them up. This would enable them to see more clearly how fiction-writing or memoir-writing techniques do and do not transfer to business writing.
Your blog is immensely informative, entertaining and useful, and it would be even more helpful if your tips were clearly applicable to the writing tasks readers are engaged in.
I’m not suggesting that people write sales pages as if it’s A Farewell to Arms but I do believe that business writers can learn a lot from good fiction. This is one of the things I like to show people—how you can learn to write better by reading widely and understanding why you like certain writing and don’t like other writing.
I hear regularly that readers feel inspired by the mix of examples on my blog—even so that several have told me they’ve started reading fiction again. I don’t know whether people who don’t like the examples stay quiet or unsubscribe.
You’ll find many blog posts that exclusively feature business examples—either real or made up; others have a mix, and some have only fiction (or memoir) examples.
Hi Henneke
Your writing is music to my ears Henneke. I’m always trying to replace repeating words with their synonyms. Even when I don’t want to remove them, I’m constantly told that ‘something different could work here’.
It’s hard to explain ‘valuable writing’ to folks that only appreciate Jargon.
Your words are an inspiration 🙂
Yes, so often people have heard of the rule about avoiding repetition, and they don’t understand repetition can be a writing technique to create a rhythm. When people complain, you can always send them a link to this blog post 😉
Happy writing, Rameeza, and thank you for stopping by. 🙂
Wonderful commentary! I’m an amateur musician. Music has always been a big part of my life. Now I understand why I enjoy using repetition in my writing. Music is such a great analogy here! I especially love your examples from Apple and Nora Ephron (seriously, is there anything she can’t write?) Thankyou!
I’m not surprised that with a keen sense of rhythm, you enjoy using repetition in your writing. Even when you don’t read aloud, you still hear the rhythm of your writing.
Nora Ephron uses repetition a lot. Some people say she uses repetition too often, but it’s an essential part of her voice.
Happy writing, Kate. And thank you for stopping by.
Great and very useful for literature lovers.
And hopefully useful for anyone who loves writing 🙂
Hi Henneke,
I am a reader of your blog and wanted to reach you to get your opinion on the Da Vinci Cartooning course run by Sean of Psychotactics. https://www.psychotactics.com/davinci/
I read in one of your responses a question that you did this course The course is very pricy and I need to make sure it is value for money.
I love drawing and want to create my own drawings for my blog just like you do. But I haven’t done any drawing since primary school so confidence is low. However I am very committed. I am a full time blogger but in very early stages of learning and development. Your honest opinion will be helpful. The course opens on 22 June. You don’t need to publish your response. You can respond to my email address below.
Yes, the price has gone up considerably since I did that course several years ago. Whether the course is worth its price very much depends on how important learning to draw is to you.
I wanted to do the course because I didn’t have much confidence and wanted a course for beginners that would help me create cartoon drawings that would be good enough for my blog. It was worth it for me, not just because it helped me create Henrietta but also because I made several friends with whom I’m still in touch. I have since done several courses on SketchbookSkool which are considerably cheaper but they’re also overcrowded (quite overwhelming for introverts) and you don’t get the same kind of support from the group as with the Da Vinci course. But the teachers on SketchbookSkook are also inspirational.
I think it really depends on your own priorities. Feel free to email me if you have further questions.
what a lovely suggestion
and what love of writing in Nora’s take
and naked truth without mistake
and a stake in the heart of the red pen
for now, is now, and then is then,
and red is heart without the pen
I love this … “Red is heart without the pen”
What an honor to receive a poem from you again, Carol. Thank you so much!
Thank you for affirming something for me that I have done on purpose for a long time now and stuck my tongue out at the grammar checker when it dings me for repetition. I will continue with my small rebellion!
I am cheering you on as a fellow rebel!
I’ve always used repetition to one degree or another in my writing. Your article, however, has given me some great new ideas. Thanks, Henneke!
It makes me happy that you feel inspired, even though you understood the principles of repetition already. Happy writing, Gary! And thank you for stopping by.
Henneke,
Great reading for a break.
Great advice as always.
Great content to enchant us.
Each one of your articles is teaching me a great trick.
Thank you.
Thank you so much, Omer. I appreciate your lovely comment. Happy writing!
I used to believe that repetition is bad.
Now, I believe it does help in creating a writing voice.
You’re correct that inexperienced writers make use of repetition irrelevantly and that’s why repetition becomes jarring. So true. I am going to use repetition tactically to make my content reader-friendly.
Thanks. You did a great job.
You’re not alone as many of us are told that repetition is bad. But it’s quite fun to start using repetition.
Thank you for stopping by, Zahid, and happy writing!
Henneke,
You are one of a kind. No gubbledygook. No smelly selling, no yelling, but giving by sharing. Even a blind man could see. You are one of a kind.
Thanks for the great stuff you provide your readers with, I’ve learned a lot from you over the years. Looking forward to many more great posts!
Thank you so much, Rich, for your generous compliment. You put a smile on my face. happy writing!
Getting ready to write some blogs for my new products and new website.. It’s daunting but appreciate your articles. I’m learning a lot.
Thank You!
I’d recommend to focus on getting the basics right—to write something that helps your ideal reader. Happy blogging!
Most of my career was teaching college writing courses. I used to tell my students to avoid unnecessary repetition; however, to remember that used deliberately to achieve a desired effect, it can be powerful. I used King’s “I Have a Dream” speech as an example. I’ve retired now, but wish I had had this blog to share with them as you covered the subject so well!
That is a great example of repetition! As writers, we have so much to learn from great orators.
This was a great blog. I was able to hear the rhythm and beat and how the sentences flowed from beginning to end.
That’s great! That was exactly what I hoped to achieve with these examples. Thank you for stopping by, David. Happy writing!
Love it. So true. When will the high school English teachers ever learn it? 😉
I imagine there might be a few who do understand it?
You had me with repetition.
You had my interest with your examples of repetition.
I enjoyed the examples that I might not otherwise have read.
You had me throughout, with repetition.
Who mentioned repetition? 🙂
Thank you for stopping by, Jan!
A related, somewhat arcane term in the “repetition” space: a former dictionary.com word of the day…
Ploce (Plo-see) noun Rhetoric.
the repetition of a word or phrase to gain special emphasis or to indicate an extension of meaning, as in Ex. 3:14: “I am that I am.”
Yes, there are many arcane words in the “repetition” space with different names for all types of repetition. I was hesitant whether to include them, but decided to focus on the basics instead.
Thank you for sharing the phrase ploce. It sounds nice, doesn’t it?
Great post, as usual! I get excited every time I see your name in my inbox and I’m never disappointed. I love how you have examples from creative writing to marketing. It really drives the point home.
I saw you discussing readability analysis and how it trips people up. You should do a whole post about that! I’ve seen people write a beautiful article then absolutely ruin it to try to satisfy the readability gods.
I can’t wait for you to release your course this year. I’ve got my checkbook ready ?
I so much enjoy choosing examples for my blog posts! It feels like they make the writing work.
And I agree with you that the readability analysis can really trip people up. They chop up perfectly fine long sentence and make the writing choppy. They delete all adverbs making the writing bland. And they get too fuzzy about transitions and repetitions.
I’m a little behind with my course developing. I’m hoping to get there in time!
Algorithms will never be as good as writers who study and practice the craft. Excellent post Henneke. Thank you.
Yes, so true. Algorithms can’t beat us. Thank you for your lovely comment, Barry!
Sounds good, I will try to implement your tips more into my writing! All I know is I’m so tired of rejection letters! Why just the other day I received one the same day I submitted my piece! Maybe that had more to do with the $5 reading fee than my writing, but who knows? Anyway, thanks for the tips, I will try to follow your advice. I love reading your newsletters!!
I’m sorry to hear about your experience with rejection letters. That sounds so frustrating. I have limited experience with pitching so can’t really help but there may be other coaches or fellow writers who can provide some help.
??? I love repetition! Perhaps I picked it up unconsciously from Lee Child, because over the years I *have* read a lot of his Reacher books ?.
I’ve also like experimenting the ‘boom, boom, bang’ approach that I learned from speech writing i.e. using repetition in 3’s, but adding a twist to the final one to make it memorable.
Here’s an example from Mark Twain (I think)
“There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.”
And another thing: this is one of those techniques that requires that I override the style guidelines in my SEO plug-in, though – a few weeks ago I took a pummeling while editing and publishing my blog post!
I love the boom, boom, bang approach! I didn’t know this term, and your example from Mark Twain is fab. ?
It feels like there’s so much more to write about repetition. Perhaps one day I can write a second post?
And yes, I get told off by my SEO plug-in for every blog post I publish, too. I recently discovered you can actually switch off the readability analysis. I might do that so I can write in peace 🙂
There’s definitely room for another repetition post ?
You might like to take a look at this website which I found in my Toastmaster days. It’s a treasure on the topic of triads, which are just repetitions with a fancy name:
http://sixminutes.dlugan.com/rule-of-three-speeches-public-speaking/
Yes to the rule of three! That’s a great list of examples. Thank you for sharing 🙂
I’ve written about the power of three once, too: https://www.enchantingmarketing.com/rule-of-three-in-writing/ (almost three years ago!)
Great post, Henneke. I love using repetition in my writing but it drives me nuts when Grammarly scolds me for it. ?
The SEO by Yoast plugin also scolds me about it all the time. We have to persist and ignore the bad advice ?
Excellent article, Henneke. I’ve instinctively used repetition in my writing and always felt it was a good tool to emphasize certain facts or tones. Your article was a refreshing refresher of this. Thanks!
Thank you, Stan! You’re absolutely right that repetition is a good tool to emphasize certain points.
What a great way to open the morning. Thank you for this magical post
Thank you so much, Dani. What an honor to accompany you this morning 🙂
Ha..Ha. Nice post Henneke. Easy to read. Easy to understand. Easy to implement.
I have always used word repetition in my writing, but never knew it had a name to it.
You got it! 🙂
This is so powerful. Thank you.
I’m glad you liked it, Eben!
This was a fabulous lesson on how to use repetition well. Great insight on how to use it in longer sentences so the sentence doesn’t get away on you. You have such a way of breaking down pieces of writing I’ve never seen anywhere else! ❤️?
It was a lot of fun to select the examples for this post!
Ultimately it depends on the discourse you want to set. Taking your example, when I put my blog post in grammarly, it suggest many things.
But then I accept only those which are mistakes from me and not deliberate insertion.
For example, I love to write sentences with ‘and’ and ‘because’. I do it intentionally – grammarly tells me to correct.
But I persist.
Follow good enough reading level and do magic as per your craft to your writing and that’s amazing.
Yes, sure. Each writing app has its limitations. As a writer, the final decision is always yours. So, feel free to break the rules 🙂